Sunday, 13 April 2014

I am Second

Life is full of choices, sometimes it is really easy to make the right one, sometimes it is not and lives are affected, I am affected.  I truly wish that I would always make the right choice, do the right thing, not hurt anyone, leave everything unaffected, but here I go again, I do it over and over, when will I ever learn!

But, I am an overcomer, I figure it out, I always figure it out.
I watched the cutest little video the other day, a little girl was meeting her new baby sister for the first time, admiring her, loving her, touching her; when the baby began to cry, the little girl sat back clapping her hands together in the amazement of it.  Then the little girl looked down at her baby sister, and looking deep into her face she said, “You okay, you okay, you okay.  You fine, you fine, you fine…” She never stopped, encouraging, loving, confirming safety to her new baby sister, that all will be well. 

This is how I feel; covered, as if there is someone hovering over me, in the deepest, loving way; confirming that all will be well… you okay, you okay, you fine, you fine. What a comfort, such an amazing little phrase of encouragement, little splashes of confirmation, yes, I will be okay.  When I hear them spoken in the spaces around me, little flutters of joy, my face breaks out in smile, and I know I will be fine.  I wrote these words on the wall in my room, so that even in my everyday going about, being busy and also not so busy times, the down times, I will be reminded.

Being reminded; reminded of just one more thing, life is not all about me; there’s a surprise, what was I thinking, why do I get caught up in that every time? Well not every time, certainly not always, but sometimes.  Everyone does at some time or other, but the fact is, none of it is about us.  Life is about how we respond to it.  Seems simple doesn’t it, responding to life; life given us by the grace of God, God in us, God’s story, us in it…how then will we live, how then will I live? 

How I need to live, is to decide to be second in every story, with every friend, in every relationship, giving all of my people and even those on the edges of my circle; consideration, patience, persevering with them, enduring with them, loving them…all of these before my needs, giving, giving always gets; getting more in return, more than a person ever bargained for. Yes, I want that.  But more than that; God first, I want that. 

How I want to live, how I need to live is all dependent on where I place God, His word, His story…that will be first; God first, me second.

Yes, this is the way, walk in it, but the gate is narrow and the way is hard…yes, I know this, but I am okay, I am fine, I am second.

I love that.